🦝 The Things We Can Do And The Things That Will Absolutely Get Me Fired (Or Blown Up)
🦝 The Things We Can Do
And The Things That Will Absolutely Get Me Fired (Or Blown Up)
By Simon, Underpaid Intern Raccoon
Beartooth Cleaning of Red Lodge
There are two kinds of requests in short-term rentals:
“Hey, can you swap the remote batteries?”
“Can you just relight the pilot light in a room that smells like natural gas?”
These are not the same category.
Let’s discuss.
🧼 Things We Happily Do (With Our Tiny, Capable Raccoon Hands)
These are normal, reasonable, fully-covered-by-Worker’s-Comp tasks:
• Change remote batteries
• Replace light bulbs (if they don’t require scaffolding and a will)
• Tighten a loose toilet seat or replace if you get the screw on screw off type.
• Reset a breaker
• Basic troubleshooting
• Small cosmetic fixes (very small)
• Towel math management because apparently that’s a competitive sport
We are cleaning professionals.
We are systems people.
We are chaos reducers.
We love this lane.
🚫 Things We Cannot Do (Even When We Love You)
This is not about willingness. We HATE saying no. Especially When we know the inability to do tasks may Be held against us. We know that it's hard when you don't live nearby or you have to call someone else. But we have to protect our staff and stay within the boundaries of our Workers Compensation policy.
This is about Montana law, licensing, insurance boundaries, and not becoming a cautionary tale. And, quite frankly, it is extremely unfair to hold our inability to do tasks that fall outside of our workers compensation policy against us. When you buy a property it is your responsibility as the owner to make sure every avenue is covered in the case of an emergency. Will we help to the best of our ability? Alsolutely! .But we also won’t put our staff at risk to do those things. When they say i’m uncomfortable with that, we respect it, and ask our clients to do the same.
♨️ Hot Tubs
In Montana, commercial and public hot tubs fall under state health regulation. Chemical logs, safety compliance, and often certified operators are required.
We clean around them.
We document issues.
We do not diagnose them.
We do not perform licensed service work. Because the last thing we want, is somebody to get a rash in the first place, they will point is the Cleaning team. We are the obvious escape goat (paging Michael Scott) if you don’t know this reference, I’m so sorry.
Because that is regulated territory, and we respect regulated territory.
🔥 Pilot Lights + Gas Appliances
If a room smells like gas and someone says, “Can you just light it?”
No.
We are not licensed gas technicians.
Our Worker’s Comp does not cover “intern raccoon launched into orbit.”
And I very much enjoy having eyebrows.
Gas is not a “quick fix” category.
🧰 Major Repairs
• Plumbing beyond minor tightening
• Electrical beyond simple resets
• Structural anything. Including climbing on anything like tall ladders. Workers comp hates ladders above 2 steps when cleaning.
• Roof work
• Appliance tear-downs or anything that would render your property in a violation. Like removing smoke detectors without putting one back up or replacing batteries.
• “It’s just a quick thing” that requires YouTube and confidence in a skill we don't have
That is contractor territory.
And contractors exist for a reason. We have a list of trusted contractors that we give to every client. These are people we have worked with, know and trust.
“But You Have Handy People On Staff…”
We do.
And we protect them first.
Just because someone knows how to fix something does not mean:
• They’re licensed to do it commercially
• It’s covered by insurance
• It’s legal under state regulation
There’s a difference between helping your uncle in his garage and performing regulated service work on a rental property.
We choose safety.
Every time.
🧰 A Quick Note on “Quick Fixes”
Sometimes owners ask, “Can you just handle that while you’re there?”
Sometimes we can.
Sometimes we absolutely cannot.
And sometimes we can, but there are added labor costs involved.
Here’s why:
When a cleaning tech has to:
• Leave the property to buy parts
• Dig through three unlabeled bins
• Drive back to the office for tools
• Spend 45 minutes hunting for a screwdriver
That’s no longer a “quick fix.”
That’s billable time.
We price cleaning as cleaning.
Maintenance time, supply runs, troubleshooting, and specialty tasks fall outside that scope and are billed accordingly.
Not because we’re difficult.
Because time, insurance, mileage, and labor are real things.
You wouldn’t expect your plumber to deep clean your kitchen for free.
We don’t perform maintenance for the price of a vacuum pass.
Fair is fair.
🗂 Help Us Help You
If you would like us to handle minor, covered tasks efficiently, please keep a clearly labeled owner kit in your owner’s closet that includes:
• Basic screwdriver set
• Correct light bulbs
• Remote batteries
• Furnace filters (correct size clearly labeled)
• Small hardware replacements
• Extra appliance parts specific to your home
If the tools and parts are there, we can often take care of simple items quickly and efficiently.
If we have to scrounge around like raccoons in a campground dumpster, it slows everything down and increases cost.
Organization saves everyone money.
Why This Matters
When we say “no,” it is not resistance.
It is professionalism.
It is protecting:
• Our team
• Your property
• Our coverage
• Your investment
We will always:
✔️ Communicate clearly
✔️ Recommend qualified professionals
✔️ Document what we see
✔️ Stay in our lane
Because staying in our lane is how we’ve been doing this since 2009 without blowing anything up.
And I would very much like to keep it that way.
– Simon
Underpaid Intern Raccoon
Beartooth Cleaning of Red Lodge 🦝
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